How Do You Spend Your Time?

Do you find that in your life after loss that there just isn’t enough time during the day to get everything done? If your time is money, how do you spend the allotment of money (time) each day? The management of time becomes an essential skill we can develop to help us navigate time!

Here’s the thing about time: it doesn’t actually need to be managed. We do! It doesn’t go faster or slower depending on how we feel. We, as a civilization, have arranged time into one 24 hour day that repeats into weeks, months, and years. Time is remarkably consistent. We are not.

Saying things such as, “If I am working really hard or I’m super busy, I’m being productive” is a myth! In fact, busyness and productivity are two separate things, and the difference between them depends on how you manage your mind around it.

Julie Martella

What needs time management then, is us as human beings. We are the ones that have fluctuating schedules, bad days, and sick kids. We are the ones who lose track of time scrolling through social media, online shopping, or watching reruns of our favorite TV show. We are the ones who need to learn how to properly manage and therefore harness the power of time.

How Do You Harness the Power of Time?

The best way to harness the power of time is to become aware of how you are using time. Your time needs a time audit! A time audit will put you in the position of scientist, Data, gatherer, and observer. There is no judging allowed! It is an opportunity for you to gather data about how you spend your time and then to look at that data to see where it is serving you and where it is hurting you. This is how you do a time audit, and I’m asking you to commit to it for ONE WEEK.

  1. Ask the googles for a free time audit template. There will be a lot!!
  2. If you don’t want to print out a template, then get a spiral bound notebook and draw a line down the side of your page, about 1/3 across.
  3. Write down one hour increments from the time you wake up in the morning to the time you go to bed at night. If you want, you can even break down the busy times into half hour increments.
  4. Starting with when you wake up in the morning, write down everything that you do during the day no matter what it is or how inconsequential it may feel. This is about gathering data.
  5. Repeat your time audit paper each day for a week. Make sure that you are noting things such as wake up and bedtimes, the times you go to work, times, taking care of kids, or paying bills, or taking care of you.
  6. At the end of your week, I want you to get out some highlighters, colored pens or pencils. You are going to color code the different activities after you make a key.
  7. Your key will represent the different activities that you do and the color that you use. For example, anything to do with kids get the blue crayon/highlighters/colored pencil. Taking care of you get the orange crayon/highlighter/colored pencil. Work gets blue, buffering activities or time out activities get yellow. You get my meaning.
  8. Go through your time on it in color, code all of the different activities with one of the colors in your key, and then you will vividly see how and where you are spending your time.

Remember there’s still no judgment allowed! This is a time for you to reflect on the data that you have collected about you and your life. Are you scheduling time to take care of you? Are you getting enough sleep? Are you spending more time then is helpful watching reruns of Game of Thrones?

Are you spending time in ways that will help you grow and get through your grief journey or are you spending time in ways that will keep you stuck? Remember, while there is no wrong answer, there is the answer that serves the version of you that you want to become. Focus on that version. Ask him/her what she needs from you.

Remember, you can do this and I’m here to help.


P.S. Time management is part of a larger coaching program I run. If you’re ready to take a deep dive into what it means to navigate and thrive in your post-loss life, just click on the contact me button at the top of the page and schedule a call. We’ll see if it’s a fit and get to work on your transformational journey!

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