The Unwritten Rules of Online Dating

Knowing the unwritten rules of dating, and creating a positive mindset with those rules in mind is the secret sauce of navigating the online dating world!

The Rules

There are some unwritten rules you need to know to protect your heart, and later yourself, as you navigate the world of online dating. Obviously, I don’t know all of them, but this is what I have learned from my interviews with both men and women who are actively dating. 

  1. No one wants to be online.  Everyone wishes they could still meet fighting over the last tomato at the farmers market.  
  2. Remember, you are taking applicants to fit into YOUR life, not the other way around.  Don’t lower you standards to meet theirs. 
  3. There is someone for everyone out there, even if that means you like to jump from airplanes in inflatable dinosaur costumes. 
  4. You need to assume that everyone you are chatting with is also chatting with 4-12 other people.  And that’s ok!  Remember the draft pick analogy of part one?  They’re checking out the possible team members.  
  5. You should also be chatting with several people.  You’re just chatting!  
  6. If someone introduces themselves to you and activates your protective intuition, get rid of them immediately!
  7. If one doesn’t work out, don’t get sad, just go back to the roster of matches.  Women especially, have the propensity to fall into relationship quickly.  That will only leave your heart battered and bruised. 
  8. Don’t assume that because you went on a date or five that you are exclusive. 
  9. You are exclusive when you BOTH have decided to commit to that, and not a second before!
  10. Three strikes and you’re out!  If someone doesn’t show up, cancels at the last minute (and sends you a great picture of why they aren’t there) or otherwise bothers you, don’t keep giving them chances!  You are setting the foundation of how you expect to be treated.  If you don’t like it, don’t accept it.  You are worth so much more!

If you have items to add to my list, please leave a comment in the box!


Julie Martella Avatar

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