In the tapestry of life, we often find ourselves adhering to various manuals and rulebooks. These guides dictate how we should act, what we should believe, and what constitutes a ‘normal’ life. But what happens when life throws a curveball like loss into the mix? It’s time to reevaluate the manuals and embrace the idea of crafting our own rules after loss.

Understanding the Role of Manuals

At its core, a manual is a set of guidelines or expectations we subconsciously or consciously follow. These manuals are often influenced by the norms of society and family as well as our personal beliefs. They can offer structure and guidance, but they can also become a source of rigidity, especially when life takes an unexpected turn.

Life After Loss: The Need for Adaptation

The loss of our loved one can shatter the existing manuals of our lives. Grief and mourning disrupt the carefully laid plans we once had. Suddenly, what was once ‘normal’ no longer applies, leaving us feeling lost, confused, and adrift in uncharted waters.

The emotional toll of trying to fit back into the old manuals can be overwhelming. It’s crucial to acknowledge that these manuals may not work in our post-loss reality.

Throwing Away the Old Manuals

Letting go of outdated manuals is a process that involves self-discovery and healing. It’s about recognizing which aspects of our old rulebook no longer serve us and finding the courage to discard them.

Consider therapy, journaling, or talking to a trusted friend or family member about your journey. Seek professional help if needed to navigate the complexities of grief and adaptation. Remember, you are not alone in this process.

Creating Your Own Rulebook

In your journey to redefine your life after loss, you may encounter external pressures and expectations. Friends, family, and society might try to enforce their manuals on you, urging you to conform to their idea of ‘normal.’

Remember the phrase: “I make my own little book; I’ve got my own back.” This mantra reminds us that we have the power to set our own rules, regardless of external influences. Politely but firmly assert your autonomy and make decisions that align with your newfound manual.

In the aftermath of loss, rewriting your manual is not only an option but a necessity.

Embrace the uncertainty, acknowledge the uniqueness of your journey, and craft a rulebook that resonates with your innermost desires and values.

Life after loss is about resilience, adaptation, and self-discovery. It’s about making your own rules, guided by your heart and soul. So, as you navigate this uncharted territory, remember that you have the power to redefine your life and embrace a future filled with authenticity and purpose.

You can do this, and I’m here to help.

Julie